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Yet, there I was, feet dipped in clear water, staring into the horizon, trying to convince two middle-aged women whom I did not know that the man I was with was indeed my husband.By the fourth day of our vacation on the islands, we had got used to being stared at.' It's different from a male to female perspective."It feels a bit simplistic to conclude that men racially profile more openly than women based on a handful of interviews, and, indeed, Tessler confirms that. They both care a ton about how white you are."Tessler suggests we approach racism in the dating world in the same way that Bumble focused on the harassment of women."I think men and women are equally superficial about race and about other things," she says. "They built an app especially around that problem," she says.
Then there is patriarchy: Women who venture out of the nest to seek a mate must lack decency.An Indian woman who has got a white man must be enlightened, even by complete strangers.A lawyer whose services I was seeking for a few marriage-related formalities started by giving me a sermon on running a background check on the man I wanted to marry because “you never know how these s are.” I didn’t call on her again.“Being with my own husband would make me uncomfortable because men would pass lewd comments with even more alacrity than when I was alone,” said Aarya.
At times she ignored the comments, but when she did try to fight back, some men found the aggression titillating: “! )” At play here is the stereotype that men from the West are interested in women mainly for sexual gratification.
"This is depressing, but it shouldn't be a revelation."I suppose that means I should just get used to comments like the one I received on Bumble last week, when a guy said, "How did you know I [heart emoji] Indian Texans?!